New Proverb

A new Timicist proverb that I read on a pencil at the UU church:

Unanswered questions are far less dangerous than unquestioned answers.

John Shelby Spong: Honorary Timicist

Through my connections to the Unitarian wing of the Timicist movement (or vice-versa, it's really a chicken-and-egg thing), I discovered a brilliant essay by John Shelby Spong, an Episcopal bishop.

"Spong" is much more than just an awesome last name. His essay masterfully puts homophobia in its place, equating it with all the other misguided ways people have used the Bible to oppress minorities throughout our history.

Some excerpts:

I have made a decision. I will no longer debate the issue of homosexuality in the church with anyone...

I will no longer listen to televised debates conducted by "fair-minded" channels that seek to give "both sides" of this issue "equal time." I am aware that these stations no longer give equal time to the advocates of treating women as if they are the property of men or to the advocates of reinstating either segregation or slavery...

The battle is over. The victory has been won. There is no reasonable doubt as to what the final outcome of this struggle will be. Homosexual people will be accepted as equal, full human beings, who have a legitimate claim on every right that both church and society have to offer any of us. Homosexual marriages will become legal, recognized by the state and pronounced holy by the church...

I do not debate any longer with members of the "Flat Earth Society" either. I do not debate with people who think we should treat epilepsy by casting demons out of the epileptic person; I do not waste time engaging those medical opinions that suggest that bleeding the patient might release the infection....

Full text here. I highly recommend it.

Timicism would like to go on record as saying, "hell yeah, you go, Spong!"

Every word of this manifesto fits with Timicism. For his dedication to truth, fairness, harmlessness, and love, I would like to extend an honorary Timicist title (of his choosing) to John Shelby Spong.

Might I recommend the "Sponginator?"

The Timicist Unitarian

So I spent all this time devising and crafting Timicism 3.0, and I come to find out it already exists.

It turns out that Timicism is just a brand of Unitarian Universalism (UU). We're not identical on all the the specifics, but the basic gist of both is the same: find your own path, respect others, borrow from all the religions, use reason and science.

I wonder if they'd be willing to merge with me? TUU: Timicism Unitarian Universalist? UTU? UUT?

I suppose the T should go last, since I was the last to join the party. I'm all about humility and fairness, after all.

Timicist Buzzwords

Paring down all my beliefs into five words (Self, Fairness, Humor, Harmlessness, Love) was a difficult task. And I'll admit that the five words themselves don't do the best job of capturing their corresponding tenet. I believe in the tenets, I'm just not sure they are all labeled correctly.

So here is the expanded list of buzzwords that represent Timicism:

Truth
Think
Self
Fairness
Skepticism
Question
Logic
Consistency
Accuracy
Humility
Humor
Laugh
Harmlessness
Love
Touch
Sex
Balance

These are the ingredients that make up the Timicist word soup.

Brainless Christian Pumpkins

A devout Christian in my family sent me the following email:

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From one pumpkin to another!!!!!!!

A woman was asked by a coworker,
'What is it like to be a Christian?'

The coworker replied, 'It is like being a pumpkin.' God picks you from the patch, brings you in, and washes all the dirt off of you.
Then He cuts off the top and scoops out all the yucky stuff. He removes the seeds of doubt, hate, and greed. Then He carves you a new smiling face and puts His light inside of you to shine for all the world to see.'

This was passed on to me by another pumpkin.
Now it's your turn to pass it to other pumpkins.

I liked this enough to send it to all the pumpkins in my patch.

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So God will open up your head, scoop out your brains, and carve a permanent smile on your face? To a thinking person, that's not a selling point. I'm half wondering if this wasn't intended to be satire, with the message being: In order to believe in God, you have to have a lobotomy.

This just proves that some Christians will use any image, no matter how horrifying or inappropriate, to talk about God.